Yahrzeit at Community Synagogue of Rye
While remembering a departed loved one brings to mind poignant memories and recollections of good times shared, dealing with a loss is often a difficult and lengthy process. At Community Synagogue of Rye, honoring anniversaries of these passings is some of the most important work we do.
In Jewish tradition, when the year of mourning is over, mourners are expected to return to a fully normal life. There are several occasions each year when our loved ones who have passed on are memorialized. The most significant of these is yahrzeit, the anniversary of the death. As is the case in all Jewish holy days, yahrzeit observance begins at night. A 24-hour candle is lit and one may attend synagogue to recite the Kaddish [the memorial prayer]. It is traditional to avoid attending any celebrations or parties on the day of yahrzeit, and some people fast on that day.
In Jewish tradition, when the year of mourning is over, mourners are expected to return to a fully normal life. There are several occasions each year when our loved ones who have passed on are memorialized. The most significant of these is yahrzeit, the anniversary of the death. As is the case in all Jewish holy days, yahrzeit observance begins at night. A 24-hour candle is lit and one may attend synagogue to recite the Kaddish [the memorial prayer]. It is traditional to avoid attending any celebrations or parties on the day of yahrzeit, and some people fast on that day.
Yahrzeit FAQs
Here are some frequently asked questions that will help shed light on our process here at Community Synagogue of Rye:
When are yahrzeits honored at CSR?
Names of departed loved ones are read at Shabbat evening services on Friday and at Saturday morning services. We also read names of anyone who died in the previous year at each of the festival services.
I don't think I received my reminder letter. When do they get sent out?
Hardcopy letters, prayer sheets, and donation envelopes are mailed out three Mondays prior to the weekend that the name will be read (based on the information we have from your family profiles). Example: Your mother's yahrzeit is to be read July 5 & 6. The notice would be mailed June 17.
Congregants also receive email reminders on the Monday prior to the weekend the yahrzeit is being read.
I am a new member, how will the synagogue know about past deaths in my family?
Yahrzeit information is requested on the information form required for membership. Since we need complete information in order to enter it into our database, the office follows up in the case that information is incomplete. Any member should feel free to call the synagogue office at 914-967-6262 to add names to their family list, ask questions about yahrzeits or to get information on purchasing a memorial plaque for their loved one.
My sibling's synagogue sends his/her notices for our parent at slightly different times than I get them from CSR. Why is that?
At CSR, the member notifies us as to whether the family wants to observe the English or Hebrew date. We use a Sunday to Saturday date capture, so if your loved ones name is being read at the Friday and Saturday services, it is because they passed away sometime in that week. Example: January 6-12 names are read at January 11 & 12 services.
Your relative may have asked his/her synagogue to track the anniversary according to the Hebrew date, but our default (when preference isn't specified) is the English date. Any member can request to have their anniversaries tracked either by the Hebrew/Lunar calendar or English/Secular. In most cases, people prefer Hebrew tracking in the case that their relative passed on/near a Jewish holiday so that the anniversary will continue to coincide with that holiday.
I am going to be away at the time my mother's name will be read at services. What can I do not to miss it?
You are encouraged to call the synagogue office at 914-967-6262 and speak with Jon Rekedal, Clergy Assistant, to have the name read at a different service when you are able to attend.
In what ways can I observe yahrzeit at home?
It is customary to light a yahrzeit candle on the anniversary of a death. The candle is lit the evening before and burns for 24 hours. Making a donation to the synagogue in increments of 18 (Chai) $18/$180, $36/$360, etc. is also customary.
As always, if you have any questions or suggestions regarding yahrzeits, please reach out to our Clergy Assistant Jon Rekedal at clergyassistant@comsynrye.org or by calling the synagogue office at 914-967-6262.
When are yahrzeits honored at CSR?
Names of departed loved ones are read at Shabbat evening services on Friday and at Saturday morning services. We also read names of anyone who died in the previous year at each of the festival services.
I don't think I received my reminder letter. When do they get sent out?
Hardcopy letters, prayer sheets, and donation envelopes are mailed out three Mondays prior to the weekend that the name will be read (based on the information we have from your family profiles). Example: Your mother's yahrzeit is to be read July 5 & 6. The notice would be mailed June 17.
Congregants also receive email reminders on the Monday prior to the weekend the yahrzeit is being read.
I am a new member, how will the synagogue know about past deaths in my family?
Yahrzeit information is requested on the information form required for membership. Since we need complete information in order to enter it into our database, the office follows up in the case that information is incomplete. Any member should feel free to call the synagogue office at 914-967-6262 to add names to their family list, ask questions about yahrzeits or to get information on purchasing a memorial plaque for their loved one.
My sibling's synagogue sends his/her notices for our parent at slightly different times than I get them from CSR. Why is that?
At CSR, the member notifies us as to whether the family wants to observe the English or Hebrew date. We use a Sunday to Saturday date capture, so if your loved ones name is being read at the Friday and Saturday services, it is because they passed away sometime in that week. Example: January 6-12 names are read at January 11 & 12 services.
Your relative may have asked his/her synagogue to track the anniversary according to the Hebrew date, but our default (when preference isn't specified) is the English date. Any member can request to have their anniversaries tracked either by the Hebrew/Lunar calendar or English/Secular. In most cases, people prefer Hebrew tracking in the case that their relative passed on/near a Jewish holiday so that the anniversary will continue to coincide with that holiday.
I am going to be away at the time my mother's name will be read at services. What can I do not to miss it?
You are encouraged to call the synagogue office at 914-967-6262 and speak with Jon Rekedal, Clergy Assistant, to have the name read at a different service when you are able to attend.
In what ways can I observe yahrzeit at home?
It is customary to light a yahrzeit candle on the anniversary of a death. The candle is lit the evening before and burns for 24 hours. Making a donation to the synagogue in increments of 18 (Chai) $18/$180, $36/$360, etc. is also customary.
As always, if you have any questions or suggestions regarding yahrzeits, please reach out to our Clergy Assistant Jon Rekedal at clergyassistant@comsynrye.org or by calling the synagogue office at 914-967-6262.
